Why Computers Are Bad For You

Dog outdoors, dog lying down, dog in countryside, dog with lead, black dog, labrador cross, German shepherd cross

This morning we were out of dog food.  I had the bright idea of boiling up some pasta.  I popped on the pasta, went out and checked some blogs on the computer.  Then another, then another until…came across blog about dogs,  dog = cooking pasta = burning smell = burnt pasta, burnt pan.  Aaargh!  Fortunately the dog will eat anything, hungry or not.

Cooked a late brunch, scrambled eggs and rosti.  While cooking late brunch prepared soup for actual vitamins later.  Went up and did some work on the computer.  “Something smells good”, said Jae, as he lay down on the sofa looking bored.  Feeling of guilt as I should be playing with Jae in the holidays, doing cool stuff like sailing or surfing which is one reason we moved to the Silver Coast.

I suggested a board game. Jae retreated before I could come up with the sentence “how about some maths homework?”  Went back to work on the computer.

Soup, eating al fresco

Jae returned a while later.  “What’s that weird smell?” he asked.  I leaped up from the computer to retrieve yet another blackened pan off the stove.  Picked out the bits of veg. that weren’t black to try and retrieve lunch.  Unfortunately the children won’t eat anything, even if hungry.

Meanwhile, Jae went in the pool.

child swimming, swimming in portugal, above ground pool

Looking forward to dinner tonight.  Maybe I’ll just go straight for a flambé.

 

Kitchen Disasters

Explosion

Okay, it wasn’t quite this bad.

 

Minor disaster day.  The toaster exploded.  I like to believe there was a spiritual connection between this and our shopping trip for an oven at the weekend.  The first proper oven in the Portuguese kitchen we are attempting to renovate.  While looking for this we’d been distracted by luxury toasters.  But we already had a toaster, a nice one at that which we’d been bought for a Christmas present, so we couldn’t justify a new one.

pic: Tod McLellan

pic: Tod McLellan

Now we’ll probably have to get one.  We all rely heavily on toast between meals in this household.  Although we do have a George Formby grill to keep us going which I found brand new and still boxed in a house I once bought, so we’ll not starve on the toast front.  Zed is meanwhile inspecting the workings of Portuguese plugs.

Toaster John Lewis

This one….

John Lewis toaster

or this one….

red toaster, john lewis

… or this one.

Meanwhile, aargh,  I then managed to burn the soup for our midday meal.  I know that’s quite a difficult thing to achieve and I only have a small window when Jae is home from school for cooking lunch.  Clearly being happily engrossed working on the computer while multi tasking at cooking doesn’t work for me.

Soup

It didn’t look like this

I replenished the saucepan with water (tip it away – are you kidding?)  and vowed never to go on the computer again while cooking.  On the way back from the bathroom I just…had a peek at emails…clicked through to a blog (about a Vietnamese food tasting tour on motorbikes) then skyped a message to my god daughter’s mother that my god daughter, who is currently in Vietnam, should try the food tasting tour.  I’m not sure her mother will welcome my suggestion that she travel around Ho Chi Minh city on a motorbike tasting food though.

Maybe I should take the tour

Maybe I should take the tour

Meanwhile, the pan was looking black again and burning smells wafted out the kitchen.  Hmmm.  Don’t have time to cook anything else.  Add more water again?

Strangely it tasted delicious.  Here is the recipe for ‘Cook and Double Burn Soup’.  One for Halloween?

Two carrots, three potatoes, handful of frozen cabbage stalks, an onion, cup of peas, stock cube.  Approximately 1 3/4 litres of water.  Put in a pan and cook until the water has almost boiled away and the pan is going brown. Replenish the water.  Boil the water away again until the saucepan is almost ruined.  Replenish the water.  Blend.  Serve with rolls, warmed in a George Formby grill or oven.  Or toast, for those of you who can.

No.  Not serious.  Don’t try this at home.

Adventure story age 8

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